SaakuraHot

I'm 19 years old and I'm a trans girl.

Joyeux Noël et excellente année. This is a very special Christmas. 2024

I love good horror movies, animation and comedy, I don't usually go to the cinema much, but an afternoon of movies with lots of sweet popcorn and comfy clothes is what I like to do the most, my favorites are chocolate and chewing gum liquid-filled figurines inside. When I was young, I was very obedient, and in my studies I was always one of the best, I am cheerful and dreamy, I always set high goals for myself, I tried to achieve everything I wanted, I live with my family, they have been my support on a daily basis, very loving I always accept myself as I was, It helped me a lot to be more expressive and to know who I was and how I wanted to be. I discovered little by little what kind of music I liked, what I liked to eat, how I liked to dress and this is how I formed my character and personality, thanks to the support of the people around me, I consider myself very familiar and I am very attached and affectionate with them, my family annoys me a lot for being too orderly, I like to go out to eat pizza, pasta, hot dogs or soups on Saturdays, it's a custom that we have always had to unite as a family, so I came to adapt this tradition with my favorite people, when I was younger I lived on a farm where I tied myself to a horse and my parents let me keep it so I called it moon and even though there were many more animals For my moon it was always my favorite, when I had to move and leave it it was very hard for me but I knew I couldn't bring it to our new home, but my parents took me every weekend to see it, nature and the environment I grew up in filled me with peace and tranquility, Riding when I feel overwhelmed by the hustle and bustle of work and the city, it calms me down, I also like to listen to music when I do an activity, on Sundays when I see sunshine days I go for a walk in the park and maybe eat an ice cream or a soda, one of my dreams is to travel the world, To discover and learn new cultures, to learn its gastronomy, its architecture, to meet lots of new people and their languages, I love when I hear the rain falling, I like to listen to it and the smell when the rain stops is something unique. During her studies at school, she had no idea what the job of a mannequin was and who the mannequins were.. She was a rather modest girl who stood out for her size and her skinny figure, and was terribly shy.. My size and my silhouette were often mocked by my peers, which gave me a lack of confidence in me and many complexes at that time.. Every year, the beauty contests were held in our school, and my teacher of literature, who was the head of the school, said to the whole class that she had remarked that a single girl could represent the class and named me..

Just at that moment, I received an invitation to participate in an appel "Web Modeling", I was thinking too much and I had doubts, but I nevertheless decided to participate. I wasn't selected at that moment, but the director of a well-known modeling agency remarked and invited me to visit their modeling school.. I listened attentively, but because of my fears that it was too difficult, that it was not small enough, beautiful enough, big enough, I did not accept and I continued my studies and. Ma mère assured me that entering dans l'école modèle would distance me from my education and that it would be serious.. The manager of the mannequin agency called me several times and assured me that my mannequin appearance could help me to become a top model and to work in the world with famous designers. They even offered me to join the modeling school for free or simply come to the agency to see the world of modeling from the inside, but every time I thought about it, my fears and my doubts took over and I couldn't resolve to visit the modeling agency. After that. The address of the agency was on the business card they gave me at the contest. Très souvent, je m'y promenais avec mon ami, et chaque fois que je passait devant l'agence, je levais ma tête et voyais la lumière à leurs fenêtres, which meant that the girls were there, the girls who were more confident and stronger than me. And during one of those nights, I took my courage and I went up to the top floor of the building to visit the agency..

Talking with the studio staff, at a moment of conversation, understanding the word "contracts" made me nervous and I understood that she had very much fear and would stay there for a long time.. They explained that, on leaving, I had to compile my portfolio, so I had more time to acquire more experience.. To get there, I had to learn to put on makeup, work with the camera and take care of my physique, combine lingerie clothes, and start managing the page.. From the following month, I took evening modeling classes.. Everything was completely new for me - from new friends, from books on the head, from wearing heels for three hours of engagement, from photo sessions.. I had to learn to pose and to express my sensuality, while in my life I had never thought to these things-là, I felt très nerveux, but determined, it was an accumulation of sentiments qui m'entourait et j'aimais cette émotion pour apprendre Savoir plus excité moi et m'a poussé à continuer, pendant la séance photo I was excited and I was excited. I really enjoyed it! I saw the camera and I felt like a fish in the water.. besides.

Inside the studio, I met another model, whom I recognized for his slender body and impressive height.. We had hardly slept the night, for none of us had diffused for many hours.. Le matin, à l'agence de mannequins nous avons rejoint 10 autres filles, nous avons commencé à nous connaître et bientôt j'ai été soulagée, car leurs histoires de vie m'ont rempli d'inspiration et beaucoup d'entre elles travaillent déjà pour cette agence depuis plusieurs années. Le matin, à l'agence de mannequins nous avons rejoint 10 autres filles, nous avons commencé à nous connaître et bientôt I've been relieved, because their life stories have filled me with inspiration and many of them already work for this agency depuis plusieurs années. I became friends with some of the girls from then on.. I was worried less and less and I felt finally calm when I saw several models, and he had nice and friendly girls, in my room he had more and more world.. It was not new for them to participate in photo sessions, to make new things for their shows.. The next day the parade started, because I had to take some pictures and everything was on another level, the catwalk seemed incredibly long, the camera flashes were brighter, the backstage was wider and the number of models and spectators was impressive, this world amazed me, as well as my adorable work and the results of my self-improvement, The modeling agency signed a contract with me and it brought me much more happiness than I expected, it left an imprint in my heart for a lifetime, over time one of the new girls when I came across her and she asked me for advice and other I was flattered because it's something I enjoy and she can tell her that being a model is a hard work, and that it doesn't show at all and a lot of love and love, you have to work very, very hard. The funniest story happened to me, when three models, including me, had to participate in the photo shoot, so we were sitting on a bus going around the city looking for locations, we were not allowed to enter the park by bus, so we chose the location near a castle where they would look great, We saw an incredibly beautiful part of the city that we didn't know, but for me it became memorable because I almost passed out from heat stroke, because we had to wear dresses in the blazing sun for photos. These days were hot! He was gone.. And without the keys to his bus we couldn't make it to the place and we couldn't take another one since our affairs were inside the bus.. Fortunately, the photographer and the make-up artist managed to enter the bus by effraction, using the same entrance.. Ensuite, moi et d'autres modèles avons dû porter toutes les choses et sans ruiner nos robes jusqu'à l'endroit nous-mêmes, marchant tout le chemin à pied, avec nos talons, car nous n'avons pas d'argent autre que ce que nous avons, nous and other models have had to wear all the things and without ruining our clothes until l'endroit nous-mêmes, marching all the way to the foot, with our heels, because we have no money other than what we have Après midi, notre chauffeur est apparu de nulle part et nous a dit qu'il s'était perdu quelque part dans la ville the day before the photo séance. Alors, he decided to stay in a local bar because he couldn't find his way, and he slept till l'après-midi, and it's only then that he finally found the way to our modeled apartments..

Whatever it is, working as a mannequin is very inspiring and gives you the opportunity to meet people from all over the world, to discover new cities and counties, the lifestyle of others and to make wonderful friends..

A very lucid souvenir of my débuts dans le mannequinat, le jour où j'ai reçu ce qui devait être une publicité qui a retenu mon attention tant tout sonnait radicalement et profondément dans ce triptyque vert "who made the tour of the maison"". On account of this first impact, I decided to call to find out more about this centre étrange et attractant en même temps.. At that time, I was desperate to find a place where I could at least educate myself academically with a minimum of dignity and desire on my part.. I visited free schools where I had attended and, after rediscovering my past, what a disappointment it was when I saw how these centres where I was, had become a simple educational enterprise where they were treated with the same lack of respect and indifference as In those public schools I had so much criticism. Thus, when I attended this information meeting, I was fascinated by the words that came out of the mouths of its two "directors" and the more I listened, the more I was attracted by what they called the "Project Éducatif des Modèles"; each of the phrases corresponded to what I've been dreaming of for more than two years..

And it is thus that he appeared in a manner unexpected in our lives.. Ainsi, quand l'année scolaire a commencé, une nouvelle phase de la vie a commencé. Thus, when the school year has begun, a new phase of life has begun.. Every morning we would go straight to other models, the city where we live, even the area where we work, which is where she was before, was further away and it took us longer to get there, it was a very different experience to be in that studio because most of the models were playing, experimenting, talking, singing, jumping, screaming, fighting, it made me think that everything they had taught me in the other studio wasn't really what I had to do because it was monotonous and they didn't encourage us to do better no one spoke to me Vivian had a bad temper or just the atmosphere was very tense all the time, I am happy to see this poster that day and to see that there are places where they help and do it together, several times in the other studio I felt trapped and without motivation, the experience was new and I loved it more and more, little by little I fell in love in all aspects, Exploring my sensuality was just something I didn't make myself known and I was surprised at how much I loved some things that before I never imagined I would try, once a user of the platform said he wanted me to pinch my nipples and I was curious, the truth is that I had never done it and I was surprised at how much I enjoyed it and how much I liked it. From there a lot more things were triggered because more than one maybe I got carried away at the moment and I learned the most sensitive parts of myself, it makes me laugh to say that because it's something I never talk about to others for fear of being called weird but one day while talking to my classmates the topic of the parts came up on the sensitive parts of the body and I realized that this is very common and that I should not be ashamed to talk about or deal with the subject, which is something that can normally be talked about,

They were coming out of the mouth of their two "directors" and the more I listened, the more I was made by what they called the Projet Éducatif des Modèles ; each of the phrases corresponded to what I dreamed for more than two years of being a person truly free and happy.. And it is thus that he appeared in a manner unexpected in our lives.. Ainsi, quand l'année scolaire a commencé, une nouvelle phase de vie a commencé. Thus, when the school year has begun, a new phase of life has begun.. Every morning we'd go straight to other models, the city where we live, even the area where we're working, which is where she's shown up before, was further away and it took us longer to get there, it was a very different experience to be in that studio because most of the models were playing, experimenting, talking, singing, jumping, screaming, fighting, it made me think that everything they had taught me in the Other studio wasn't really what I had to do because it was monotonous and they didn't encourage us to do better no one spoke to me Vivian had a bad temper or just the atmosphere was very tense all the time, I'm happy to see this poster that day and to see that there are places where they help and do it together, several times in the other studio I felt trapped and unmotivated, the Experience was new and I liked it more and more, little by little I fell in love in every aspect, Exploring my sensuality was just something I didn't know myself and I was surprised at how much I loved some things that before I never imagined I'd try, once a user of the platform said he wanted me to pinch my nipples and I was curious, the truth is that I had never done it and I was surprised at how much I enjoyed it and From then on, a lot more things allowed themselves because more than one maybe I'm getting carried away at the moment and I've learned the most sensitive parts of myself, it makes me laugh to say that because it's something that I never talk about to others for fear of being called weird but one day when talking to my classmates the topic of the parts is I came to the sensitive parts of the body and realized that this is very common and that I can't be ashamed to talk about or deal with the subject, which is something that we can talk about normally,

One of the most beautiful stories I've had with a person I loved was at school, the courses were just beginning and it seemed like it would be an année ordinaire sans aucune différence, nous avons vu l'année dernière arrive heureuse, raconter des blagues et donner vie à quel point nous I thought the path was dark to reach this goal. I had five years to be close to them.. That morning we did the training as always on the first day, the alumni were waiting for the Rector's welcome words and expecting new people to come to our class and more importantly, who would be our course coordinator, and, after 45 minutes After talking about our future as we left school, The interesting thing happened, the introduction of the new students, and that's when I saw it, at that time I was laughing with a friend about the appearance of the rector's mustache when he spoke, and the The rector introduced him, I didn't hear his name but I saw that he was going in my row, He actually walked into my class, he was the tallest in the class, he was a bit brown, he was still a few years old before he had a more mature face but he was attractive, he was dressed in a burgundy red beret, a red plaid shirt open at the top, a white skeleton type shirt underneath, Wearing black jeans and boots of the same color, I really didn't know what caught my eye but I was ready to find out in time.

They were coming out of the mouth of their two "directors" and the more I listened, the more I was made by what they called the Projet Éducatif des Modèles ; each of the phrases corresponded to what I dreamed for more than two years of being a person truly free and happy.. And it is thus that he appeared in a manner unexpected in our lives.. Ainsi, quand l'année scolaire a commencé, une nouvelle phase de vie a commencé. Thus, when the school year has begun, a new phase of life has begun.. Every morning we'd go straight to other models, the city where we live, even the area where we're working, which is where she showed up previously, was further away and it took us longer to get there, it was a very different experience to be in that studio because most of the models were playing, experimenting, talking, singing, jumping, screaming, fighting, it made me think that everything they had taught me in the Other studio wasn't really what I had to do because it was monotonous and they didn't encourage us to do better no one spoke to me Vivian had a bad temper or just the atmosphere was very tense all the time, I'm happy to see this poster that day and to see that there are places where they help and do it together, several times in the other studio I felt trapped and unmotivated, the Experience was new and I liked it more and more, little by little I fell in love in every aspect, Exploring my sensuality was just something I didn't make myself known and I was surprised at how much I loved some things that before I never imagined I would try, once a user of the platform said he wanted me to pinch my nipples and I was curious, the truth is that I had never done it and I was surprised at how much I enjoyed it and From then on, a lot more things allowed themselves because more than one maybe I'm getting carried away at the moment and I've learned the most sensitive parts of myself, it makes me laugh to say that because it's something I never talk about to others for fear of being called weird but one day when talking to my classmates the topic of the parts is I came to the sensitive parts of the body and I realized that it is very common and that I cannot be ashamed to talk about or deal with the subject, which is something that can be talked about normally, From one of the most beautiful stories I had with a person I loved was in school, classes had just started and it seemed like it would be an ordinary year without any differences, We saw last year arrive happy, telling jokes and bringing to life how dark we believed the path was to achieve this goal, I still had 5 years to be close to them. That morning we did the training as always on the first day, the alumni were waiting for the Rector's welcome words and expecting new people to come to our class and more importantly, who would be our course coordinator, and, after 45 minutes After talking about our future as we left school, The interesting thing happened, the introduction of the new students, and that's when I saw it, at that time I was laughing with a friend about the appearance of the rector's mustache when he spoke, and the The rector introduced him, I didn't hear his name but I saw that he was going in my row, He actually walked into my class, he was the tallest in the class, he was a bit brown, he was still a few years old before he had a more mature face but he was attractive, he was dressed in a burgundy red beret, a red plaid shirt open at the top, a white skeleton type shirt underneath, Wearing black jeans and boots of the same color, I really didn't know what caught my eye but I was ready to find out in time.

The weeks began to pass and the classes became a spectacle of laughter and games, but up to this moment I had not had the opportunity to speak to him, although I noticed that his gaze momentarily lost on me and then timidly withdrew; One morning during a school break I was with my friends talking about twilight movies and how happy we would be with a vampire boyfriend, minutes passed and the conversation calmed down a bit, at that point two of my friends went to play volleyball and I stayed with another friend and I confessed that I felt attracted to the new boy, so we got up and went to get him, just to realize the whim of seeing what he was doing, and we found him on the football field talking with other friends of He, we approached in the most hidden way and having fixed everything my friend pushed me making me fall near the group of boys, there the first to help me was the boy, the friends started to bother me and I blushed, at that moment I let myself go and I answered them with jokes and then the boy also started to bother me, he was finally on his way, although he was very bold, he told me to take off my clothes because I was very pretty, It bothered me a bit but it was nothing serious so I played along, we talked a lot that day and by the end of class we were already on each other's facebook. When I got back, the only thing I could do was see his profile, see the photos he had, the tastes he had, the trips he had made, when he arrived at 6 o'clock in the evening he wrote to me and asked for my landline number, he whom I called a few minutes later, I was very excited, I picked up the phone and we started talking, we talked about everything, tastes, family, school gossip, the history we might have, the history of the people, and that's it. Midnight came with sleep on my back and a smile painted on my face, he whispered something to me that I didn't understand at first. The next morning I understood that he had told me to be his girlfriend and because I hadn't listened properly I said yes, so I became more nervous, I saw him coming and going off the road, I approached him as if nothing had happened and I kissed him more nerves than love, he took it as an unwanted action so in less than 24 hours, They were on top of things, and just as I start, I finish, literally overnight. Il nous a fallu beaucoup de temps pour en reparler I have had a lot of time to talk to you,

sometimes he would call me or I would call him, our eyes would meet and we would flirt while kissing, but we never went any further, and at that time gossip began to appear, little stories that one never dares to verify for fear that they are true; They said he wasn't with me because he felt sorry for me, because I wasn't a woman worthy of him, obviously I never asked him personally, so I kept my tears and screams in my secret place. But I couldn't let him go, I knew that my heart wanted him, so I called him, I asked him for forgiveness and I invited him to lunch at my house, this weekend I repaired myself, I repaired my house and I waited until he arrived, my parents took care of him. Like a good host, he ate lunch, shared with the family, made them laugh and made the dishes, an action that captivated my mother.. We watched movies all afternoon accompanied by occasional kisses and corn chips, the following Monday I was thrilled to have a story to tell my friends, he had been very nice, I fell completely in love with him, I wrote his name like a fool on my notebooks and I started imagining the stories alongside him, possible trips, possible exits; The school break alarm went off and I went to pick him up, he was with his usual friends and when I greeted him and looked for his lips, he withdrew them, the same ones who had kissed me at home, I understood at that moment that he didn't want to show his friends that he was with me, because one of them said I was ugly, that it wasn't fun to be with me and in order not to lose his friendship he put his ego above my heart. Le soir, nous avons parlé, mais il n'a jamais été capable de me dire la vérité, il a toujours trouvé des excuses farfelues or invented a script pour une comédie bon marché et petit à petit, I've started to feel my heart being shattered into pieces.

A month later I met two boys and a girl, they were from the other class, but they took a bad look at me and they got closer like a plan of friends, months later she became my best friend and the other boy, well, he was a very cute and attractive boy In every way, A week after meeting them, I ended up being the girlfriend of the cute boy, with great happiness I told my friends and a few hours later that the news reached the boy at first, I actually expected him to manifest, but apparently he didn't have the slightest attempt to make anything count in his life, Then I understood that it was time to let go and move on, I focused on spending time with my boyfriend, laughing, playing and disturbing, we were the four friends, from one side to the other until one Friday my cell phone rang, it was the guy from the beginning, it was my boyfriend who answered and well, I don't talk to him very subtly. At that moment, another boy who had nothing to do with this part of the story confessed to me, and well at that moment, I had only the initial garçon et mon petit ami dans la tête, the rest was just ghosts, alors évidemment je l'ai rejeté pour raisons tout de suite, but, on his side, il ne He's not completely gone, he's stayed in the friend, in the support.. One après-midi, among so many others, the sœur du garçon du début called me, she did it to see what possibility there was that he and I would return; of course I missed him, but at this moment I had a petit ami and that's what I told him.. Little by little, I started talking to the boy again because he started calling me every night asking me to break up with my boyfriend, to give him the opportunity to be my boyfriend, that this time he would do things right, sometimes it looked like he was crying, some like he was desperate, well, even though it broke my heart, it made me cry and depressed, I told him firmly -NO-, that I would not leave my boyfriend for him, that he had already had his time and opportunity and he let himself be carried away by what others were saying and not by what was actually dictated in his heart, but it was my heart that betrayed me and he was to blame, because he really loved him and not my boyfriend I really loved him, so one day I ended with the excuse that I was tired of the monotony, that same afternoon the first boy came to my house with a chocolate bar and a blue rose, We watched movies and kissed like we never did before, before we left we were already dating, and the truth is that I didn't care about leaving my ex completely destroyed for two days, I loved my new boyfriend, I got back what I dreamed of at the beginning of the year, I tried to apply everything I read about love stories with him, The details, the outings, the conversations, everything I've come to love. It was all beautiful. Even the professors loved the couple we formed, even the coexistence coordinator accepted us, and she was the most feared of the institute..

A month and a half later, things started to change, you never realized the storm was coming until you saw the clouds so close they could already moisten you and that's how it happened with him.. We had very little argument, but I thought it was for pure nonsense, for useless things and it didn't affect our love life in any way, but he approached me one morning, and looking me in the eyes, he told me that it was over, he took in his hands a letter that I had written myself with his own hands and he tore it to pieces, leaving the remains at my feet; I didn't know what to do, I didn't know what to say, I didn't know how to act, something in me broke, something in my change and it started to show during the day, because I couldn't I didn't find the right time to cry, I did it in the living room, In the course, during breaks, in the bathroom, in my room, I thought it was because I was really ugly, but a week later she came back and I didn't know what to do, with my soul destroyed and without any guardians, so she let me take it once again, And then things got even stronger, the kisses were more and more exciting, the caresses, although daring, were like an escape for both of us, it was our secret, our virtue, our ideal love.

We were young and we didn't know what it was like to be naked in front of each other and have sex, but I can't deny that we didn't try, because we tried to do it twice, but we couldn't, I don't know if it was due to our lack of experience or because maybe life and God didn't want it to happen, even knowing that my family gave everything for him, that they blindly trusted him because I convinced them of that, well, his family adored me too, so they supported us a lot in the details, in the beautiful outings, they liked to see us when we kissed and talked to each other tenderly, and well today I remember the happiness with nostalgia what happiness I was without knowing it. Toute l'année est passée, la dernière année est partie et les suivantes sont montées, un nouveau cap, a pas de plus vers le but et bien, moi avec mon copain près de moi. All the year is over, the last year is over and the next one is over..

Enter the boy who offered me, my friend, my support, although he told him that he wasn't always there and well, so many things my boyfriend had done to me make me want to be a little rude to him, I could treat badly because I felt entitled after lowering myself in front of others, Then I started to feel that he wasn't giving anything for the relationship, so I made the worst decision of my life, and it was to end my greatest love story, I surrendered to my friend, to the one who hadn't left me, but I knew that his attraction was purely physical so we couldn't even reach an escape in the relationship, So, six months later, I looked for the boy I had always loved, and well he received me, but it was no longer the same, the wounds in his heart had left him very affected and the debts of the soul were difficult to recover and to tell the truth, he already had someone else to think about.

Enter the boy who offered me, my friend, my support, although he told him that he wasn't always there and well, so many things my boyfriend had done to me make me want to be a little rude to him, I could treat badly because I felt entitled after lowering myself in front of others, Then I started to feel that he wasn't giving anything for the relationship, so I made the worst decision of my life, and it was to end my greatest love story, I surrendered to my friend, to the one who hadn't left me, but I knew that his attraction was purely physical so we couldn't even reach an escape in the relationship, So, six months later, I looked for the boy I had always loved, and well he received me, but it was no longer the same, the wounds in his heart had left him very affected and the debts of the soul were difficult to recover and to tell the truth, he already had someone else to think about.

I'll wait for you in my transmission so you can get a little more on me.